Menu

ABC Please

A butterfly resting on white flowers in soft sunlight

ALPIMS • DBT-INFORMED SKILLS

ABC PLEASE

Small moments of meaning. Practical care for your body. Support that fits your capacity.

ABC PLEASE brings together positive experiences, manageable achievements, preparation and bodily care. Use the standard skills when they fit, or adapt them to your health, circumstances and capacity. You do not need a diagnosis to use this page.

Explore ABC Explore PLEASE Back to ALPIMS – DBT

You deserve care for your own sake. You do not have to earn rest or become more productive. Choose one useful support; this is not a daily checklist you must complete.

What does “reduce vulnerability” mean?

In DBT, this means attending to factors that can make painful emotions harder to manage. ABC builds supportive experiences and skills; PLEASE attends to bodily needs.

It does not mean that illness is your fault, that emotions are always controllable or that good self-care prevents disease. These skills may support coping and daily life alongside appropriate healthcare.

This is an adapted educational resource, not a validated ALPIMS treatment programme.

Find a starting point that fits today

Capacity can vary between activities and from day to day. These are options, not levels you need to progress through.

I have room to practise

Try an enjoyable activity, a manageable challenge or a practical routine.

I need a smaller version

Shorten the activity, use a simpler step or prepare fewer things.

I need help or adaptations

Use assistance, an aid or a change to the environment.

Care and recovery come first

On a very difficult day, prioritise essential care and reduce demands.

ABC • Meaning, confidence and preparation

Choose something that is both useful and achievable. That might be a full activity, a short version or one step with support.

A • Accumulate positive experiences

Make room for something pleasant or meaningful, without pressure to feel happy.

Small example: meet a friend, enjoy a hobby or take a moment to notice something pleasant.

B • Build mastery

Practise something achievable that helps you feel capable. It does not have to be a chore.

Small example: practise a recipe, learn part of a skill or make one clear request.

C • Cope ahead

Prepare for a situation that may be difficult. Choose support, a response and a way to pause.

Small example: prepare for a meeting, plan a difficult conversation or arrange a break during an appointment.

PLEASE • Care for your body

The letters are a memory aid: PL = physical illness; E = eating; A = avoid mood-altering substances; S = sleep; E = exercise. Below, exercise is adapted to medically appropriate movement and energy protection.

PL • Attend to physical illness

Follow your care plan and seek help with symptoms, treatment or access to care.

Small example: ask someone to organise a prescription or write down one concern for your clinician.

E • Nourish and eat regularly

Start with enough food and a manageable eating pattern. Adapt to medical and sensory needs.

Small example: arrange an easy, tolerated meal or snack before you become very hungry.

A • Consider substance effects

Notice whether alcohol, recreational drugs or stimulants such as caffeine affect your mood, sleep or symptoms.

Small example: ask a pharmacist about a concern rather than changing prescribed medication yourself.

S • Support sleep and rest

Make sleep more accessible and seek care for persistent difficulties. Poor sleep is not a personal failure.

Small example: reduce one tolerable source of light, sound or discomfort before bed.

E • Move only as appropriate and tolerated

Choose enjoyable exercise or movement that fits your health and capacity. Adapt or rest when needed.

Examples: walking, dancing or a suitable exercise session; a shorter or supported option when needed.

Choose one small support today

What would make today a little more supported?

One easy meal. One request for help. One pleasant moment. One appointment adaptation. Or permission to stop and rest.

If choosing is too much, a supporter can offer two manageable options and accept “neither”.

Example: everyday practice

A person plans lunch, takes a walk they enjoy, practises a few chords on a guitar and rehearses a calm request before a work meeting.

They are combining bodily care, a pleasant experience, mastery and coping ahead. Their next step is to see what helped and adjust, rather than do every skill perfectly.

Example: a day with limited energy

A person has pain and very little energy. They ask for a tolerated snack, look at a favourite photo and practise saying, “I need to stop now.” A supporter helps prepare a shorter appointment for tomorrow.

This combines nourishment, a positive experience, practising a skill and coping ahead. There is no requirement to add exercise or complete every letter.

If you experience PEM, shutdown or a flare

Reduce the size and number of steps. Reading, planning, emotional work and social contact can all use energy. Notice delayed effects as well as how you feel in the moment.

During shutdown, reduce questions and demands. Use familiar supports and accessible ways to communicate. Revisit skills practice when you have more capacity.

PEM, flares & recovery • Coming soon
Optional: when health or sensory needs affect the skills

Anxiety & Autonomic: prepare for distressing situations while respecting bodily symptoms and condition-specific care.

Laxity / Connective Tissue: include joint protection, practical adaptations and appropriate rehabilitation.

Pain / Bodily Sensitivity: make room for symptom care, rest and achievable participation.

Immune / Inflammatory: follow treatment and necessary dietary or environmental protection.

Mood / Mental Health: practise positive experiences, mastery and coping ahead alongside suitable mental health care.

Sensory / Neurodevelopmental: use clear prompts, predictable choices and sensory accommodations.

You do not need to explore these domains to use ABC PLEASE. They are additional considerations when relevant.

The role is supportive. ABC PLEASE is not established as a treatment that corrects autonomic, immune or energy dysfunction across these conditions.

For families and supporters

Ask what help is welcome. Prepare food, reduce an environmental demand, assist with care or make an activity accessible.

Recognise effort without requiring more. Avoid using ABC PLEASE to monitor compliance, judge motivation or make someone earn care.

Supporting care without pressure • Coming soon
Sources and scope

ABC PLEASE comes from DBT skills developed by Marsha Linehan. The capacity-sensitive examples and adjustments here are ALPIMS adaptations, not a separately tested programme.

Information, not individual treatment advice. Adapt skills with appropriate clinical support. Difficulty with self-care may reflect symptoms, disability, finances or missing assistance. New or changing symptoms need appropriate assessment.

A • Accumulate positive experiences

Why it may help: making room for comfort, connection or meaning can support quality of life, even when symptoms remain.

Adapt it: choose something tolerable and low demand. A positive experience can be quiet or brief; it does not have to change your mood immediately.

Over time, this can also mean small steps towards what matters to you, with help and capacity limits included.

Small positive & meaningful moments • Coming soon

A range of options

Join a class or visit a friend; enjoy a short hobby session; ask someone to share a favourite photo. Choose what feels pleasant or meaningful to you.

Values & meaningful activities • Coming soon

B • Build mastery

Why it may help: practising an achievable skill can support confidence and a sense of agency. Enjoyment is useful, but mastery specifically involves developing competence.

Adapt it: practise a tiny part of a task, use an aid or ask for assistance. Learning to request help or recognise a stopping point can be meaningful mastery.

There is no automatic requirement to increase difficulty. With PEM or fluctuating capacity, a smaller step may be the better choice.

Mastery within your capacity • Coming soon

A range of options

Learn a new skill or practise a manageable challenge; rehearse one step; use help or an aid. Choose a task that stretches you a little when appropriate, without making success depend on exhaustion.

Setting achievable goals • Coming soon

C • Cope ahead

Why it may help: preparing and briefly rehearsing a response can make a difficult situation easier to navigate.

  1. Name the situation and likely needs.
  2. Choose one support or skill.
  3. Rehearse a sentence or response.
  4. Include a pause, exit or recovery option.

Adapt it: use a written sentence, voice note or supporter instead of visualising. Preparation can mean requesting a quieter setting, shortening a visit or postponing it.

Keep rehearsal brief. If it becomes rumination or increases distress, pause and seek support.

A gentle cope-ahead plan • Coming soon

A range of options

Rehearse a presentation or a difficult conversation; prepare one sentence; ask a supporter to help with a written plan. Include both how you will respond and what practical support you need.

Clear requests & difficult conversations • Coming soon

PL • Attend to physical illness

Why it may help: attending to symptoms and treatment needs can reduce avoidable strain and support daily functioning.

Adapt it: organise reminders, prescription help, accessible appointments or a short symptom summary. Follow prescribed treatment and ask about side effects or difficulties.

New symptoms should not automatically be explained as stress. Anxiety or trauma can coexist with physical illness.

Making healthcare easier to access • Coming soon

A range of options

Manage appointments and treatment yourself; use a reminder or symptom note; ask someone to help organise care. Treating an illness does not require becoming symptom-free.

Medicines, side effects & care routines • Coming soon

E • Nourish and eat regularly

Why it may help: enough food and a manageable eating pattern support bodily needs and may reduce the added strain of hunger or missed meals.

Adapt it: use easy meals, tolerated textures and help with preparation. Consider reflux, migraine, gut symptoms and medically necessary restrictions without adding unnecessary food rules.

Regular eating may help avoid large gaps between meals. It does not guarantee stable blood glucose or explain every mood change; diabetes and other glucose concerns need individual advice.

Seek dietetic support if restrictions, nausea, low appetite or sensory difficulties make adequate intake hard. Sweet foods are not a moral failure.

Nourishment with individual needs • Coming soon

A range of options

Plan varied regular meals; keep simple food available; arrange shopping, preparation or feeding support. Fit the plan to your budget, culture, access and health needs.

Easy meals & regular eating • Coming soon

A • Consider substance effects

Why it may help: understanding whether a substance worsens sleep, distress or physical symptoms can inform safer choices.

Adapt it: consider your own response rather than a blanket rule. Discuss concerns with a clinician or pharmacist.

Prescribed medicines that affect mood are not automatically substances to avoid. Do not stop or alter prescribed medication without advice. If dependence may be present, seek medical support before stopping alcohol or sedative medicines.

Substances, medicines & symptom sensitivity • Coming soon

A range of options

Notice patterns yourself; discuss one concern with a pharmacist; seek specialist help if changing substance use is difficult. Aim for informed support rather than judgement.

Getting help with substance use • Coming soon

S • Support sleep and rest

Why it may help: sleep support is part of attending to bodily and emotional needs. Routine changes alone do not resolve every sleep problem.

Adapt it: try one tolerable environmental change or a flexible wind-down cue. Continue prescribed treatment such as CPAP and seek assessment for persistent sleep problems.

Rest and sleep are different needs. With ME/CFS or other disabling illness, do not remove necessary daytime rest simply to follow a generic sleep rule.

Sleep support with complex needs • Coming soon

A range of options

Try a realistic sleep schedule and wind-down routine; change one source of discomfort; seek help for persistent insomnia, breathing problems or other sleep symptoms.

A flexible wind-down routine • Coming soon

E • Movement, pacing and recovery

Why it may help: appropriate movement can support wellbeing for some people. Its suitability and dose depend on the condition and current capacity.

Adapt it: consider joint stability, pain, dizziness and delayed symptom worsening. Use condition-informed advice rather than a generic exercise target.

With PEM: do not push through symptoms or use fixed activity increases. Manage activity within individual energy limits. Even gentle movement can be too much; rest may be the appropriate action.

Movement that fits your health needs • Coming soon PEM, flares & recovery • Coming soon

A range of options

If appropriate for your health, choose walking, dancing, sport or strength work you enjoy. A shorter session, seated movement or supported rehabilitation may fit others. Some people need rest rather than a movement task.

Choosing an enjoyable activity • Coming soon

Everyday practice

Choose an activity that is pleasant, practise a manageable challenge, prepare for a predictable stressor or improve one care routine. Balance practice with the rest of your day.

An everyday ABC PLEASE plan • Coming soon

A smaller step

Make the activity shorter, reduce the number of decisions or do one part. Enjoy one song instead of a whole outing, practise one sentence or prepare one easy meal. A smaller version can still be worthwhile.

Making a skill smaller • Coming soon

Supported practice

Choose what help is welcome: reminders, shared planning, transport, food preparation, communication support or a more accessible setting. Support can increase your choices while you remain involved in decisions.

Supporting care without pressure • Coming soon

A care-first day

When unwell, exhausted or overwhelmed, prioritise essential care, safety and reducing demands. A supporter can assist with food, prescribed treatment and a tolerable setting. Skills practice can wait. If PEM applies, protect energy limits and consider delayed effects.

PEM, flares & recovery • Coming soon